The Brokeback Mountain 'Lovesick" Diet

[Bobby19in1963]

Okay all:

Back to weight loss.  It has been rocky from about 50 lbs. down to where I am now, hovering around 60 lbs. down.  I can't exercise much more, but with all that is going on in my life, I lose focus so easily.  I was thinking the other day that I haven't set down and really outlined a few goals for myself in a very long time.  Perhaps that will help me get my mind focused.

I also need to see the movie again.  It has been a month or more since I saw it and it is impossible to maintain the intensity without those visual images being refreshed in this old brain fairly often.

We went out to a fancy French restaurant on Monday to a retirement party for one of our docs.  I had Escargot for the first time, and Duck a la orange (sp?)...it would have been like takin' Ennis out to this place as it was taking me!  The desserts were to die for...anyway, that started my week and for some unexplained reason I went to Costco yesterday and had a HOT DOG from their vendors!  Boy! It hasn't taken much to tilt my wagon a little.

The major challenge is that I jumped off the diving board trying to impress my grandchildren and something popped in my back.  Been to chiropractor twice and had a theraputic massage ... a little better but not much after 11 days now...so have decided to try the traditional medicine way and see my PCP tomorrow.

All of this is excuses for gaining about a pound and not losing.  I only mention it because I have to be very focused and controlled because it was at about this kind of weight loss for at least three times that I know of that I lost it and gained it all back VERY quickly.

So I HAVE to stay focused...so I'll be here more often because it helps so much to chat among friends.

Side note - we get dust storms here and one came through and blew our carport tarp into the neighbors yard doing $300-$500 in damage.  I hate it when 'life' happens like that, don't you?

Glad to see you are all trying and succeeding.  Rome wasn't built in a day, we know.  Keep up the good work...let's keep our goals positive and forward looking.  You absolutely know that someday we're going to SEE each other in the flesh and some kind of convention or something...won't that be a hoot???!!!

Bobby

[Lola]

I agree, stay focused that is the key.  Everyone slips up once in a while, true, but sometimes when we slip up it is not so easy to get back on track.

Weight Watchers says BAM, breath accept and move on, not always easy to do.

I find I have to stay focused at all times and not let my guard down ever.  I can have treats, sure, but they have to be planned.

I could eat a big mac and fries and then jog around the block, but what good would that do me?

What would I have learned? 

littledarlin keep cutting back on those sweets, I guarantee you will feel better in the long run!


Losing it is half the battle, as we all know, taking it off is one thing, keeping it off is another.   FOCUS!! 

[littledarlin]

Thanx! for all the kind words. A comment on sweets. I found that if I have a good balance of protein in my diet that my cravings for sweets go away. The sweets I like are the grapes and blueberries and blackberries and strawberries that taste so good now.

I'm going to a Personal Trainer on Saturday who knows all about Body For Life and even has the recipe books and encourages her people to eat that way. It has worked for me...as long as I remember more calories out than in!

Bobby

but NOW, I might turn out to be that ski bum before it's over!

You're right about staying close here.  I've gotten so busy with 2 1/2 hours of exercise a day that I miss coming here like I should.  I'm hoping my Personal Trainer will shorten those hours a little and get the same results for me.

Bobby

Bobby,

I definitely agree with the grapes and berries.  Pineapple and apples are also favorites of mine.  It's so nice not to be obssessing about food!!  Much rather obssess about BBM!!

2 1/2 hours a day?  You're an animal  !!  I'm sure your trainer will help you get a very effective work out in shorter time.  I find myself semi-power walking (my favorite exercise) 1-2 hours a day (once or twice on the beach, once with the dogs) and I use that time to lose my self in scene replays.  Truly the best of both worlds.  I do the 30 minute circuit workout 3-4 times per week and I'm glad it's available, I'm not into a gym, to much pressure to look good IMO, though a personal trainer is a great motivator!!

You will see results quickly because trainers can really reshape your body, and lucky guys, you don't have all that girl fat to deal with...

You be that ski bum and I'll take up wind surfing and sailing, instead of dreaming of it!!   

[Bobby19in1963]

My wife is from the Columbia Gorge area of Oregon where windsurfing is so popular.  Never been there myself, and she hasn't been back in decades.

I'm hoping what you say of trainers is true.  I need to cut down on the time and increase the effectiveness, and that will certainly help.  I'll keep ya'll posted.

I'm always running into people here at the hospital who are pulling me aside and asking what I'm doing.  I was telling them it'll all be in the book, which comes out in late July...our book, ya know.  But then I was assuming too much, that my story would be in the book.  I'll have to wait and see.

Lola:  You have so much wisdom and are so supportive.  Thanx!

Bobby

[Lola]

I am here for you sweetie, we are in it together.  Even though I don't have alot to lose, I lost alot for me and I know keeping it off is going to be a battle!

[Bobby19in1963]

I totally lost focus last night.  Been really tired with that back pain thing and had to babysit the grandkids.  So, I was tired, hungry, at my daughter's house and trapped there until late night...when I discovered some cookies and Worther's candies!  Before you can say hayrojayrokimbokimborabbasnapandfunnywigglecomin'downthebottommichakimakimeo I had eaten almost all of them!  That was on top of having TWO hotdogs w/buns for dinner.  OUTACONTROL was my middle name yesterday.

But today, I'm back in control, and believe I can keep in control.  We are taking the adult kids out with us tonight for dinner to celebrate my wife's birthday and our anniversary on Monday.  It's our favorite restaurant, so I know what to expect and can deal with it.  I've lost 60+ lbs. going there every Friday night, so it must be working.

Had another person ask me how I did it...but it's like that old story about the farmer who prepared to feed a whole field of cattle, but only one showed up and he gave that one the whole load?  When this guy's eyes glazed over I realized I was over the top.  I prefer just saying...

I'll let you know when the book comes out and you can read all about it.  I'm helping compile it with a bunch of friends and it'll be out in late July...tee hee hee!

I'll see my PCP for my back problem this afternoon, my personal trainer tomorrow, and I'll let you all know wassup with all of that.

In the meantime, like Lola says...F O C U S S S S S S !!!!

[Lola]

You know I have no sweet tooth at all and yet I find those Worthers candies hard to resist, there should be a law against them.

And if I kept cookies in the house, my husband would eat the bag till it was gone. It is so hard when you are out of your routine, not in your own home and tired and cranky. 

Good luck sweetie, I know you are going to be fine.  I am going out to dinner with friends tonight and to a very large dinner party tomorrow night.  Tonight should be fine, tomorrow is going to be hell! lol

But come Sunday I am going to be back focused, in my routine, with the foods I know and can trust, my water, my walks, the whole bit.

Grrrrrrrrrrr it all just shouldn't be this hard.   On the good side, I am wearing some beige slacks tonight (very form fitting) and I haven't worn them in years! 


P.S.  Happy birthday to Mrs. Bobby and Happy Anniversary.


focus, focus, focus, focus..........

[Bobby19in1963]

Something is working...I lost another two pounds...64 lbs. total.  That is 30 lbs. on the Family Biggest Loser scales, so all I need is six more pounds in two weeks and I think I win the money!  I was surprised at the loss because we went out to eat Friday for the bday and Saturday had friends in the both chicken AND ribs, plus Cheesecake Factory cheesecake for dessert!  Whoa!  However, I did wash both cars, mow both back and front lawns, sweep the porches, vacuum, change bed linens, swept all tile floors, mopped the kitchen and dining area and folded clothes in the morning.

After that I went to meet with my new personal trainer for the first time and she thinks I can lose another 40 lbs. before the reunion in late September.  That would be 100 lbs. since last year and should turn some heads!  Her studio is just two blocks from my house, so it's really convenient.  It helps living in the downtown area...but then there are 30 places to eat within two blocks, also.

I have to have an x-ray and MRI of my lower spine to make sure I haven't done some permanent damage from my pool incident.  Got some muscle relaxers which have helped tremendously!  I have decided to limit my exercise to only aerobics on the bikes until after the MRI report.

BIG NEWS!  I'm about a size 38-42, depending on the pants, so went to Salvation Army on Saturday and purchased four pair of almost new pants for a DOLLAR each!  I wore a pair to Church and looked really slim!  Most people are so jealous!  I love it!

Wanted to go to see all the sales in the store, but realized that since I am still losing a size a month or more I might as well just cool that urge until I'm down to near goal.  I did get a new pair of cargo pants at Costco and that cost me five times as much as all four pair of pants together.

I feel so good that I am even considering setting up a more comprehensive goal system.  Obsessive Compulsive, you know.  Have you ever heard of The Common Denominator of Success?  I have a tape by Earl Nightingale who recaps it.  You can also Google it and find a copy on the Internet.  It is short, and I suggest that you take a look at it.  Helps understand how people become successful.  It isn't by doing the ordinary stuff we always do.  Successful people are extraordinary.  I think everyone who has found this Forum fits into that category.  We are not the normal group of people...we have something in common and we are doing something about all of these thoughts we've been having since seeing the movie.

The common denominator of success...the secret of success of every person who has ever been successful...lies in the fact that the person formed the habit of doing things that others don't like to do.  If the secret of success lies in forming the habit of doing things that others don't like to do, let's start the boiling-down process by determining what are the things that others don't like to do.  The things that others don't like to do are the very things that you and I and other human beings, including successful people, naturally don't like to do.  In other words, we've got to realize right from the start that success is something which is achieved by the minority of people and is therefore unnatural and is not achieved by following what we normally like and don't like, nor by being guided by natural preferences and prejudices.

But if they don't like to do these things, then why do they do them?  Because successful people do things they do not like to do, they are able to achieve their goals.  They are not influenced by how they reach these goals, but rather by the results they can obtain.  Successful people are influenced by the desire for pleasing results.  Others are influenced by the desire for pleasing methods and are inclined to be satisfied with such results as can be obtained by dong things they like to do.

Have a grrrrr8! day!

Bobby

[Lola]

However, I did wash both cars, mow both back and front lawns, sweep the porches, vacuum, change bed linens, swept all tile floors, mopped the kitchen and dining area and folded clothes in the morning.

You did all that with a back injury, I hate to see what you are capable of when you are not in pain! lol   Can you start on my house next Bobby? he he he

It does feel good when people notice, I got a ton of compliments on Saturday, but I try and not let it go to my head because I know I have a ways to go, I don't want to get too relaxed.

We have a vacation coming up late this month, we fly out for a week, so I am FOCUSED!!!  I plan on packing a few "tankinis"!

Keep up the good work everyone. 

[littledarlin]

You guys are so inspiring!!  Bobby when you're done at Lola's house can you swing by mine???  You sound like a dream come true!!!! 

Congratulations on all of your success!!!  Lola, in my mind you look just like Claudia Schiffer--imagine that!!  We are all beautiful on the inside so it really doesn't matter!!

I jogged for the first time yesterday!!  Not really by choice, but a bad storm came up on the beach while I was walking and fear was my motivation (I'm in the lightning capital of the world down here!!).  So I started jogging into the driving wind and rain all the way to my beach access (maybe 1/3-1/2 mile).  I was so proud of myself!!  Once I realized that lightning wasn't going to kill me I let myself enjoy it!!  What an exhilarating rush, I felt so alive, and proud for pushing myself.  Today at work someone said you've lost weight haven't you?  Just a little, but I feel like I'm glowing from the inside out.  I can't wait until I'm as far along as you two are.  I know, it takes time. 

Great shopping tip Bobby.  Our goodwill has tons of new stuff and I agree why waste the money when you know you're going to lose more.  That is positive thinking!!

I've read in the threads that others have lost weight also.  It's so interesting to me that this film has been a turning point for so many.  I wish everyone could view it through our eyes.

We just got our first shipment of cherries from CA.  Yum, why was I wasting my time with crap?  No more huge swings in appetite or mood!!

I'm down here with Tropical Storm Alberto swirling around me, so no beach walking for a day or two.  But next time I will definitely try jogging again!!

Thanks again for being there!!  Ain't life sweet?

[Ennis Del Mark]

Bobby,

Congrats!  I lost 30 lbs. last year and grew a goatee and looked pretty good (so many said).  But I had some rough times and I started eating bad stuff, etc. and gained 15 of the 30 lbs. back.  Two weeks ago I said, that's it.  I am back eating better and exercising again and drinking lots of water and only one diet soda a day.  No fast food (watch "Super Size Me" and you won't WANT fast food!), as little fried food as possible, fruits and veggies, and some dairy every day.  I have lost six pounds (I'm at 224 now and I want to get to at least 215, maybe 200).  It's hard, but I want to look good and feel good like I did last year.  We must keep encouraging each other!  I haven't read all of the letters on this post, but I am here now to join in our support group!  Last night at a birthday party for me (I'll turn 47 on June 15) my birthday treat was low-calorie chocolate cheesecake!  And it was wonderful!  It's just small steps like this which help us lose.  So wish me continued success, as I do you.

Sincerely,

Kirb     

[Bobby19in1963]

Wellll....this has been the week that wuz!  With my wife's birthday and our anniversary over now...whew!  Back to FOCUS, FOCUS, FOCUS!

Lola, Kirb, Littledarlin' and Everyone - What a support group!  I always feel so good when I get here each day.  The marvelous thing is that we have this wonderful movie that has so many facets it is hard to fathom.  I was listening to the soundtrack on the way to work this morning and the songs brought back such vivid memories of when I was first enthralled by them and the movie.  I had a few tears in my eyes remembering the plight of our boys.  I like to throw in Devil's Right Hand because it always makes me smile.  But ended my drive with I Don't Want To Say Goodbye...because I DON'T!

Kirb (and everyone):  Let's make a pact that when we first encounter the next rough times, let's get our hunsins here and talk about it so that we can support each other.  PMs are good if it's really close to the heart.  It's why I weigh each day...I know, lots of people say you shouldn't, but it is my check on just where I'm at and I need it to make sure.

I DO wish you continued success, Kirb, and if you'll notice I think all of us have the ideas down about what we should and shouldn't be doing with eating and exercise.  What this Forum helps us do is keep the MENTAL part going as well as possible.

Littledarlin' I know I sounded like a Saint, but I'm really not.  I wish I had been doing this kind of Saturday work all my life, but it has only been since Brokeback Mountain that I made the change.  Shame on me.  I used to spend the same amount of time out garage saling!

Tell us about how the hurricane treated  you!  Didn't the winds jump up really quickly so they upgraded it?  Now that we know where you are the Hurricane Season means a lot more to me.  I live in the Arizona desert and the only hurricanes that really give us fits are the ones that come up the Sea of Cortez toward Yuma and then when they hit our 7,000 foot mountains in Central Arizona they drop all that rain in a hurry.  It has happened a couple of times in my lifetime and I don't want to see it again.  We average 7" or so of rain a year here, so getting 11" in a weekend or a day kind of overwhelmes the whole area.

But, for now, we're in an 11-year drouth that has the potential of burning our forests up this summer.

Back to last night.  We went out for our anniversary dinner to Mimi's and had a wonderful meal.  Turns out another couple who had been married 63 years stole our thunder (we've only been married 41), which was okay.  We just had a quiet dinner and then dessert with our kids later.

I'm having the hardest time getting back on track, but hope to do that today.

I just emailed a friend about friends and how using a seesaw as an analogy works.  Life has its ups and downs.  Friends usually are most helpful at the ends of the swing.  When we're almost too high and about to fly off the end, our friends push off and bring us slowly back...then when we're close to hitting bottom they're there to counterbalance and bring us gently back up.  When they're about to fly off the other end, we push off and bring them back down to a smoother ride.  As we go through life, this balancing act can be moderated by a good friend on the other end to help us through the ups and downs of life.

Ever try to just balance a seesaw in the middle?  It's hard and only lasts a little while, then one or the other goes up or down and we're off again.

Have a grrrr8! day!

Bobby

[Lola]

41 years, wow, that is a looooooooooong time.  Of course not as long as 63! lol  YIKES   

The thing to remember is there will aways be birthdays, always be anniversarys, Mother's day, Father's day, Christmas, New Years, Easter etc. etc.  And when you come from a big family (as my husband does) there are lots of these occassions and guess what they roll around year after year, every year.

So we have to learn how to handle them.  The week days are a piece of cake for me (no pun intended) but the weekends are harder, because we always have something going.

And that is what I am learning to deal with.  That and being around alot of friends and family who love to eat and drink and love to overinduldge in general.

And winter, spring, summer or fall, it is always something. 

[littledarlin]

Hi everyone!

I just went back and reread most of this thread and I am continually amazed and renewed by all of your words.  I need a new scale ( mine says I weigh 13. 0.0 st-lb no clue what that means) and I knew I saw one on here and I'm headed to target soon (thanks lola!).  I too feel it's important to weigh everyday.  I am now over 2 weeks with no sugary snacks or junk food.  I feel so much better!  I've lost about 7 lbs according to the scale at work.  My clothes aren't tight anymore, my bra is on the third (last) hook instead of the first!!  I feel so much more comfortable.  I have lots more to go (maybe 40 lbs?) we'll have to see when that gets closer.  right now i'll be happy just going down in my clothes size (i've been in XL for forever!)  But as I said they aren't tight anymore.

We (my club) have a very unique approach to breaking a plateau.  Gary Heavin (the founder) has done extensive research with Baylor U in this area and I have seen living proof that it works.

  Your metabolism resets itself lower as you continue to diet.  Your body has the ability to become more efficient at using it's calories-therefore you start to burn less when you exercise.  So to boost metabolism back to prediet levels we eat more food.  It seemed so scary to me in the beginning but I've seen it work and it makes sense.  so for 3 days you eat 2000-2500 healthy calories(gaining 2-4 lbs), then 2 days of 1200 calories(losing those 2-4 lbs), then 5 days of 2,000-2,500 healthy calories(gaining 2-4 lbs), then 2 days of 1200 calories (losing the 2-4), then 7-10 days of higher calories always followed by 2 days of 1200 calorie days to burn off that 2-4 lbs.  Each time it takes longer to gain those 2-4 lbs so you are raising your metabolism, your body is burning more calories now.  If you go back to the lower calorie eating after a month of this process you will have reset your metabolism to 2,000-2500 per day and will see a much better loss when you start the 1200 per day (for only one week-then 1600 per day). 

Unfortunately I tend to not follow my own advice.  I know I am really lowering my metabolism right now and it will slow my progress.  But my appetite has changed, definitely for the better and when I hit that plateau, I know how to turn it around.

Cellardwellar you look awesome!!  I can't wait to put up before and after pics-maybe by the holidays.

  I survived TS Alberto no problemo, just lots of rain, which we needed for brush fires we've suffered with all Spring.  Bobby, I hope you get some rain- those fires are the worst!!

 I've increased my beach walk from 3 to 5 miles 2x per week, still 3 miles 3x per week too.  I have been doing my circuit training too.  This is the first time I've managed to diet and exercise at the same time.  usually it's one or the other.  I've eaten out lots this week with great success (I hate to cook since my divorce. 16 years of "what's for dinner?"  with no compliment ever from ex-husband, has really turned me off cooking, which I used to love )Tomorrow I'm going for Sunday brunch at the Crowne Plaza and I'm more than a little nervous.  OMG it's a buffet with a table full of sweets to tempt me...  I'll keep all of you with me for strength  .  I've been eating Dole frozen pineapple chunks (1/4 cup) for dessert and they are so delicious and sweet.  It's just like sorbet but in whole form.  Yummy.

Sorry for going on so long, but it is so wonderful to have you all to communicate with.  I can't wait til we all go on Oprah (bobby I think that was your post) to share our success stories with this beautiful "lovesick" diet. 

I hope everyone has a great weekend!!

[Lola]

littledarlin what a great post!!

That was very interesting stuff about lowering the metabolism, I will mention it to my husband, that may just work.

You keep up the good work and good luck at the buffet, I try and avoid those places like the plague! lol

And I love pineapple, especially fresh, I would take that over a big rich dessert any day.  That and fresh strawberries! 


I go on holiday week after next, so I really need to get serious this coming week, I love to walk, but we are having a little heat wave right now, that's okay though, I just dress cool and carry a big bottle of water.