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Author Topic: The Brokeback Mountain 'Lovesick" Diet  (Read 380930 times)
Bobby19in1963
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« on: May 03, 2006, 11:07:57 AM »

Hi! All:

I been wanting to start a Brokeback Mountain 'Lovesick' Diet thread for some time.  Some background on my story:  When I first saw Brokeback Mountain is was in late January or early February in 20 minute snatches, late at night after everyone was in bed, on my computer using a pirated downloaded copy...I know, I shouldn't have done it, but....

Then I discovered the Brokeaholics site and my life began to change dramatically.  I found this group of people who loved me just because I came to the Forum...non-judgmental...truly accepting for the first time in my life.  I began posting my sad story of a Brokeback Marriage, and began exploring what it might mean to acknowledge that I am a gay man.  Whew!  That was like birthing an elephant!  Lots of screaming and yelling and grunting...and there is was, this big fat GAY man, weighing in at 276 lbs.

At the same time, I found all of a sudden that I was lovesick...and the best I can explain it is that since I am the same age as the characters in Brokeback Mountain, I was just lovesick for love...the kind they had...the kind I could have had...the kind I CAN have...the kind we all want...oh! the emotions just went through all the extremes.  I was in love with Ennis.  I was in love with Jack.  I was in love with the soundtrack and played it constantly.  I was in love with the scenery.  I was just sick with LOVE!

Then something started to happen.  I began to break out of the old thinking, and start saying to myself, God loves you as you are, I love you as you are, I'm okay.  Soon I began to think differently and decided that I needed to be more attractive in order to attract the kind of people I want to now surround my life with.  So, I got serious about exercise and diet and now, three months later, I've lost 51 lbs..

I'd like to start a thread here where those of us who want to cast off those extra pounds can talk about how we're doing it.  I've dieted for the past 30 years and know all the things I should do.  However, it took the motivation I found here ... to be a better person ... to be someone others might be more comfortable around ... but mostly, to become healthier and happier and make life work better.

What do you say?  Can we swap stories about how we're doing it, and encourage others to do the same?  It's all mental, ya know.

At the same time, if you are completely satisfied with who you are at this point in life, then more power to you, big or little.  I don't want to offend anyone, but if I can be of any assistance to anyone in losing weight or becoming more fit, I'm here for you.  And, by the same token, I hope to continue to learn from you on what you do when the going gets tough.

Bobby

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Nick_F
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« Reply #1 on: May 03, 2006, 11:16:04 AM »

Bobby. thanks for starting the thread good to have you here!

i wish i had lost weight, but unfortunately not.

Good luck with the thread!

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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #2 on: May 03, 2006, 11:26:12 AM »

How do I do it?

Well, I've done Weight Watchers until I can scam it with the best of them.  You know, eat just about enough to lose, say, 1/4 lb. a week, but not gain.  That happened at about a 20% weight loss, but could never get over that 20% threshhold.

So, what WW taught me is that each point is about 60 calories.  Take your weight and calculate how many points you can have.  But mostly, what WW taught me is that it is all about calories.  How many you eat and how many you burn.

Then I looked at Body For Life.  They have a wonderful site at Bodyforlife.com.  Lots of good information.  I simplified it down to this:  On my left palm I make a circle and say, that much protein.  On my right palm I make a circle and say that much carbohydrates.  Then I multiply that by six meals a day, add veggies at lunch and dinner, and that's what I do.

I eat the same breakfast every morning.  I know, some of us guys like it very simple.  I eat four egg whites (I use Egg Starts from Costco), one-half carton a day.  Easy.  Just microwave and salt and pepper and eat.  I also have about a 1/4 cup of oatmeal, made in the microwave with water, to which I add about a half a cup of blueberries (fresh or dried), a couple o packets of Splenda, and I also add some Konsul bran, to bulk it all up.

That's my breakfast almost every morning.  I don't have to remember anything but those ingredients.  I also add about three teaspoons of flax seed that I grind up here at work.

For mid-morning meal I have a palm's worth of strawberries and a handful of almonds.

Lunch is one can of salmon (protein) and a big salad of carrots, lettuce, tomato, cuke, and an apple (carbohydrate).  The apple gives me a sweet jab in the mouth, and provides extra moisture to make the salmon go down...it can get dry in big chunks.  My one guilty pleasure, which after a 51 lb. loss doesn't seem to make that much difference, is the salad dressing.  I put about a quarter a cup on because it takes that much to 'dress' the huge salad I eat.

I grab some nuts in the afternoon, but since I leave from work early, I usually don't get anymore carbs at that meal.

Supper is simple, one palm of protein (chicken breast, chicken strips, whatever...last night is was a breast from KFC and a left over half of baked yam/sweet potato...deelicious!) and a carb of good size, like a potato or rice or some pasta, and I like squash microwaved with a little butter.  You can add peas, green beans, whatever for another vegetable.  I have some Swich Chard growing in my garden I can't wait to get into!

Later I can have a cup or so of Low Fat Cottage Cheese and some pretzels.

Okay, so I don't do it perfectly!  But...results!

Bobby
« Last Edit: May 03, 2006, 11:40:11 AM by Bobby19in1963 » Logged

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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #3 on: May 03, 2006, 11:33:26 AM »

Exercise!

I joined the YMCA, which is close to my house.  I also have a stationary bike at home.  I try to do at least 500 calories, 250 on my bike at home and 250 on the one at the Y each day.  This may be one of the keys.  Burning extra calories.   I didn't start out being able to do that, but have worked up to it.  Start easy...it will pay dividends.

Whatever you do...DON"T HURT YOURSELF!  I screamed that, because safety is so much better than not being able to work out because you're too sore or too hurt.

I've never been a sports nut, so all of this pumping iron machines at the Y is new to me, but they have a trainer that will stick with you for a couple of weeks until you get the hang of it.  Then you can ask questions of them or anyone who looks fitter than you, and most people are wonderful about giving advice.  Take what you think is good, and works for you, and leave the rest for someone else, is my motto.

You have to do your best to build some muscle, because muscle burns calories and fat doesn't.  Whatever you do, walking, running, biking, whatever...move your body and do whatever you can to build some muscle.

I now walk a mile on the track at the Y before I start exercises.  It's a good warm up since I'm in the Arizona desert and yesterday it was very close to 100 degrees F out!  Then, lower body one day, upper body the next, and aerobics every day, or any combinatin that keeps you going and healthy.  I may have been overdoing it a little at first, but I had to Jump Start the process.

Also, they say not to weigh every day, but I do.  I need that constant check on where I'm going.  Water weight loss depends on what you have or haven't been drinking.  I drink tons of filtered water to offset what I lose in sweat.

So...gang...that's why I do.

What do you do?

Bobby
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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #4 on: May 03, 2006, 11:34:46 AM »

Hey! Nick:

Never too late!  Keep it as simple as possible and it can work.  If I can be of help, PM me or ask and I'll do what I can.

Bobby
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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #5 on: May 03, 2006, 11:38:37 AM »

BTW - When anyone asks what I'm doing, I used to tell them a modified WW/Body For Life plan.

NOW, I tell them, it's all in the book that I'm helping to compile that will be out in late June.  Until then, I have to keep it a secret!

What a hoot!

At least I'm already drumming up readership for Up On Brokeback...that's the one I voted for!

Bobby
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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #6 on: May 04, 2006, 09:41:52 AM »

Good Morning All:

My example is working here at my employment.  All of a sudden, two of my fellow Exec Assts showed up in my office with serious faces and Weight Watcher Journals in hand.  They said, "We have decided to do it!"  I had samples of all 12 weeks of booklets left over from my several WW outings, so we got them weighed in, and gave them a couple of words of advice, and created an Excel spreadsheet to record their weekly weigh ins...and off they went.

The advice this week for them was simple:  You must return and report.  WW is successful partially because you have to 'fess up' once a week to someone.  They've chosen me, because I have a scale in my cube and I'm sincerely concerned with their success.

Listen...I am not pushing Weight Watchers or Body For Life...I am just using them as examples of things that I've done in my life...picked up a little info here and there...and made my own lfestyle choices.

Bottom line is...(I sound like Ennis)...to get some reins on this one, if you feel you are overweight and want to lose some extra fat cells, you have to moderate your calorie intake and add exercise to your life.  How you do that is your challenge, but if you want to talk about it, PM me and I'll do whatever I can to help.  It's one way I may be able to repay everyone here for all they've done to help me.

As a disclaimer, I am not health professional, or expert, just experienced.

I may talk about how much I've already lost, but I have 60 more lbs. to go, so you know I'm in this for the long haul.

I will plug the YMCA.  I've been very happy with what they've been able to do for me.

Have a grrrr8! day!

Bobby
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« Reply #7 on: May 04, 2006, 10:39:35 AM »

Bobby-  Thanks very much for starting this.  I don't have time right now to think of all that I might want to post here, but this is important so I just wanted to drop a line to let you know.  I do think mutual support can be a great help, but so few will accept that in this area (in my experience).  Maybe BBM will broaden (no pun intended) the range!  I'll be back....
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« Reply #8 on: May 04, 2006, 11:29:23 AM »

WOW Bobby I am glad you PM'd me, you are doing great.  Can I ask what height you are.  If you want to lose another 60, that is over 100 pounds you are shooting for!  Alot of weight, but I am sure you can do it.

Also just to let you know KFC is not the best thing to eat!  Wink  It is fried chicken, even if you took the skin off it is still fried.

You can get boxes of frozen boneless breast of chicken that are easy to take out the freezer one at a time and cook.  Or even buy a whole roasted cooked chicken at your grocery store deli.

And salmon is not something you can eat every day. It should be limited to once a week or so, maybe try tuna, if you like it.   I love those eggs in a carton, I just pour about a cup in a frying pan, with some no stick spray and it is ready in a minute or two.  And there are lots of no fat dressings out there, that are very low in calories and points.  I think drinking water is key, and I have no problem getting it all in.  Especially since discovering Crystal Light it is delicious.

I am doing Weight Watchers now and I love it.  I am in my 4th week and have lost 11 pounds, I probably want to lose 10 more.

Get ready for summer and get rid of the winter fat.  I find exercise does help alot, but I don't go to the gym, I just walk, walk every day and take the dog.  I go farther each week.


And as you said WW works because you have to be accountable to someone, I like that, I like knowing I will be weighing in on a Tuesday, the meetings are also very motivational.  You may considering going back to it.  As you know the program is excellent.  It would help you keep on track to be accountable too!

The advice this week for them was simple:  You must return and report.  WW is successful partially because you have to 'fess up' once a week to someone. 

P.S. my husband has the Body for Life book.  And I recently bought Dr. Phil's. The Ultimate Weight Loss Solution, it is pretty good, again very motivational.

So good luck and I hope more people join in the thread! Grin



« Last Edit: May 04, 2006, 11:44:49 AM by Lola » Logged

 
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« Reply #9 on: May 04, 2006, 12:17:29 PM »

Congratulations on your weight loss Bobby!

Another thanks from me for starting this topic. My diet could hardly be called a Brokeback Mountain diet since I'm a vegan. I had been a half-assed vegetarian for much of my 20's. I went vegetarian at 32 and finally went completely vegan last November. I have lost 15 pounds since then. I do watch what I eat since a lot of things like potato chips, which I love, are vegan AND loaded with calories.

I'm 45 and work as a registered nurse, so I'm on my feet all day. I have realized if I want to make my job easier and I want to live to have a healthy retirement (which I'm planning for now) I really need to lose weight. Even though I'm walking a lot at work I do not exercise outside of work much. I will not go walking (I was attacked on a biking/walking trail several years ago) and I don'treally like the gym. But I need to come up with something. I didn't like the one gym I went to. I may have to try the other one in town. It is very hot in the summer here too. No way I'm exercising outside.
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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #10 on: May 04, 2006, 01:08:11 PM »

Can I ask what height you are.

I'm 6'0" and come from thin stock, so being fat has been an aberration in my book.  My goal is to have some muscles, so it will depend on when everything evens out.  If it evens out at 165, that's good.  Otherwise I'll just decide as I go.

KFC was a guilty pleasure!  I got my wife a full meal, but just a chicken breast for me.  I loved the smell, the salty taste...skinned the dern thing, and gave the skins to a skinny little granddaughter.  Ate some of the crispy just for fun.  Had a portion of yam/sweet potato for the carbs and I think that was it.  That was 3-4 lbs. ago, so I guess it worked!  My wife had had a bad day and I had just exercised for an hour and a half, so neither of us wanted to cook.  You do the best with 'wut' ya got and don't stress.

Would salmon three times a week be overboard?  I like to add a can to my salad at lunch time for the protein hit.  I add an apple for carbs.  The apple sweetens and moistens the salmon and the rest of the salad.

What's your favorite low-cal salad.

Glad to hear you're doing WW.  I believe the research is in...only WW wins in the end.  But...it turns out only about 5% of WW clientele keep the weight of any significant amount of time.

Speaking of summer...it's arrived in Arizonee!  My coach suggests I swim twice a week for 30" which I liked a lot.  For a warm up, I usually walk a mile on the track at the Y.  It has everything, I guess.

Check out the Body for Life.com Web site.  They even have demos on how to do exercises.

Good luck! and nice loss so far.

Bobby
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« Reply #11 on: May 04, 2006, 01:17:14 PM »

went completely vegan last November.

I didn't like the one gym I went to. I may have to try the other one in town. It is very hot in the summer here too. No way I'm exercising outside.

Hi!

I think vegan might be ideal...but I have a ways to go until I can think about it.  Lots going on now, and not enough time to think most days.

Do you have malls in your area?  In our area, there are regular groups of people who use the malls to walk in.  They are recognized by management, even give themselves club names I think, and walk where it is in air conditioned comfort.  Just a thought.  I've done most of my calorie burning on a stationary bike.  I try to burn 500 extra calories a day, either at home or the gym.  It helps not to stress the old knees, too.  Hope you find a safe place to walk.  You're the second person in a week who was accosted while walking and that's really a 'g-d bitch of an unsatisfactory situation,' to quote an old Friend of mine.  (We're the same age...me'n them boys.  'Cept I was a waterski bum at that age, naive, gay and didn't know it or perhaps knew it, but didn't really...no 'wut' I mean?  I could have been either one of them Up On Brokeback (my pick for book title).)

Come back here often.  We'll all do our best to welcome you and provide uplift and info when we can.

Bobby
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« Reply #12 on: May 04, 2006, 01:40:19 PM »

Bobby 6 foot tall and 165 would be very slim, if your goal is to have muscle, you will probably end up settling on a higher weight.  My son is 6 foot 1 and very muscular, six pack and the whole bit and he is 190!   Anyway you will figure it out as your weight goes down.

As for Salmon, check out this article:

http://www.oprah.com/health/omag/health_omag_200504_mercury.jhtml

I think probably less than 5% of the population lose weight and keep it off.  We have a guy in our meeting who reached goal in 98 and has been attending weekly meetings ever since, I think that may be the key right there.

I love salad and I put everything in there but the kitchen sink, if it is a veggie, in it goes!  I can hardly wait until the produce becomes more plentiful and fresh and less costly.  We are heading into that season now, which is great.




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Bobby19in1963
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« Reply #13 on: May 04, 2006, 01:58:26 PM »

My son is 6 foot 1 and very muscular, six pack and the whole bit and he is 190!

As for Salmon, check out this article:

http://www.oprah.com/health/omag/health_omag_200504_mercury.jhtml

I'd settle for a six pack and the whole bit at 190!  I'd also like a 'whiskey spring!'

Read the salmon article and will change my diet accordingly.  Thanx! for the tip.

Bobby

P.S.  I'm secretly hoping that somehow we'll see Oprah do a follow-up on Brokeback Mountain featuring the Book!
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« Reply #14 on: May 04, 2006, 05:07:59 PM »

I have a feeling BB was not one of Oprah's favourite films of the year, I think she liked it well enough, but not as much as others.  I kind of doubt she will do another show on it.

This could be a good post, it could help alot of people, I hope you get alot of responses, and not just alot of lurkers!  Wink
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