Celebrating One Year of the Brokeback Forum

[alexisg]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

I can't remember exactly.  I had read the short story and someone on my LJ friends-list was talking about how it was being made into a movie, a few months before it was released.  So I started to hunt down info.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

See above.  Yup.  Read it and cried.  And read it again.  ( I think I thought maybe there was a trick ending, or something.)

When was the first time you saw it?

Dec 10th, 2005

How many times have you seen the movie?

7 Times in the Theater.  Probably about 7 or 8 times on DVD.

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

I was lucky in the sense that everyone wanted to see the movie.  Some more than once.  I had a friend go with me 3 times.  I only saw the movie alone once.  I was in a business trip in January of '06 and my evening plans had fallen through.  So off to Brokeback I went.

Which character did you most identify with?

I identified with both Jack and Ennis, equally, having been parts of them both at different times in my life.  I definitely am more of a 'Jack' - but have Ennis lurking beneath the surface.

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

I think the message of the movie was something I understood.  However, it only re-enforced it. 

Embrace love. 
Trust in your heart. 
Fear is the killer of hope and dreams. 
Dare to want more than beans for yourself and those around you.

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

Honestly, life hasn't changed all the much for me.  I have the same job, live in the same house.  However, I've met some truly wonderful people through BBM, and for that, I am forever grateful.  Friendships that have been forged by a mutual love of this movie and story which have turned into very deep connections for me.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

Probably through LJ or some place similar.  I might have done a search.  I joined, but lurked for a long time.

When did you first join the forum?

January 30th, 2006.

What made you join?

I just wanted to get as much information as possible about the movie.  And find slash.

Do you remember your first post?

Nope, let me go back and look...

Ha, it was a post saying I donated to the Oscar Ad campaign.

[PennQuaker]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

The entertainment press, midsummer 2005.   Was only nominally aware of Ang Lee then, and hadn't heard of Ledger or Gyllenhaal.  Then, around Labor Day, I saw the trailer, and was transfixed.  The music moved me as much as the scene clips.



Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No.



When was the first time you saw it?

My 46th birthday, Thursday, 22 Deceember 2005 .. and at least once every day thereafter, until 9 January.   Another dozen and a half movie screenings until it closed in April 2006.  I remember hoping that it would turn out differently if I watched it often enough.



How many times have you seen the movie?

36 times in the theater, but only 2 or 3 times on DVD.  Something about the absence of the huge screen, the endless darkness, and physical isolation in the theater .. these just can't be replicated anywhere else.  That, and the remote.



Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

I proselytized to everyone who'd listen, but never got anyone to go along.  This was an unexpected blessing:  I needed to commune with the characters and story while alone.  I did, however, get dozens of others to see it on their own.  I still don't speak much to the few who didn't "get" it.



Which character did you most identify with?

Unquestionably, completely, totally Ennis.  This has not changed. 



What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

Mostly, I got a shocking and baleful portrayal of my own future, if I didn't somehow find a way to start living life again. 



Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

Though certainly not racked by the same poverty, heartbreak and rootlessness as Ennis, I'd already spent a decade in my own trailer.  The movie and the forum compelled me to open the door and look outside again.  I had my first nonprofessional contact with another person in over a decade -- with another forum member, who was half my age and lived a continent away. 



How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

A Google search as I attempted to find somewhere and someone with whom to indulge my obsession. 



When did you first join the forum?

8 January 2006. 



What made you join?

Reading my first forum post -- one by our beloved Auntie.  I remember thinking, if this story can affect a straight mother the same way it did me, I wasn't hallucinating .. this really was an oracle for us all.  It's kind of like being a Joni Mitchell fan:  I have an immediate sense of understanding and comfort level with anyone who "got" this film.



Do you remember your first post?

It was a small introductory post, thanking the founders for creating such a wonderful place.  And I need to do that again, a year later.  The movie, and all of you, have changed my life.  I'm so grateful. 

[Bethie]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

Saw previews back in Nov 2005. I just remembered seeing the mountains and
that it was termed as an epic love story and the characters were supposedly
gay. I then went and saw Casanova(Jan) and was very much impressed with Heath
(looks mostly  ) and knew he was in BBM. I wanted to see how his acting
style differed in the two movies.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?
Bought the novella after the movie. I don't like reading books and then
seeing movies, but I'll see the movie and then read the book. Book is
always better, but in this case they were spot on. I was disappointed that
the novella was only 30 pages.


When was the first time you saw it?
Jan 15th and saw it three times that week.


How many times have you seen the movie?
All total? 25 times? 11 times in the theater.

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?
I saw it 7 times by myself. Took a friend and she hated it, hated it!
Took a married couple and they thought I was crazy, and pretty much
hated it and didn't get it. Took a girlfriend and she squicked out over
the FNIT, but did cry at the end. And the last person I saw it with was
my mom. She thought it was good, but couldn't understand why I was
so tore up over it.

Which character did you most identify with?
Ennis. Gah!

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?
Still trying to sort it out. That love is beautiful and precious, that any one who chooses
to love another person, despite race, color, gender etc should be allowed
to and that it really is nobody's business but their own. Why should anyone care
who loves who? Or who people choose to sleep with every night? Who cares!
The movie has brought out a ton on compassion in me for others. I've tried to be kinder
nicer, more giving. I've tried to open my heart to life.


Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?
I can't imagine my life before BBM. It was pretty boring I guess. It definitely was
more simple. Now? I'm travelling a whole lot more, enjoying being with people who
"get it" and allow me to be myself. I'm quieter now, more observing and choose things to get
upset over, instead of stressing about everything. The biggest thing I am trying to
do is mend my broken heart, but still keep Jack and Ennis alive with me every day.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?
Google searched the internet for anything Brokeback. Found a Yahoo group in the
BBM movie area and stayed there for a week and then found DC from a fanvid that was
linked to here. Google landed me here for a day and then I lost the link, but do to the
above sentence found my way here.

When did you first join the forum?
Jan 26th 2006.


What made you join?
I was going crazy with grief and drowning. I needed something to help me breath again.
I found the impact thread and Women's thread
and found a place where I fit and people understood me. The yahoo group was okay, but it
was filled with bitter angry people and trolls and I knew I couldn't stay there. I needed something
to make the pain go away. I was totally shattered inside.

Do you remember your first post?
Jan 29th. I spilled my guts out on how the movie affected me. Thank god! I found my place
in the Slash Threads. That part of the forum saved my life, both emotionally and psychologically.
I get to be with Jack and Ennis everyday, in all sorts of situations.
I had to have an alternate ending to help me deal with my grief.

Yep this was long! 

[City Girl]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

NPR

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No

When was the first time you saw it?

December 16th

How many times have you seen the movie?

lost count

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

Yes. 2 (one of them a second time, does that count as 3)

Which character did you most identify with?

oddly enough, Lureen

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

Decisions based on fear are flawed

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

Sane, quiet, a bit numb.  Frantic, obsessed, but oddly enough happier and more meaningful.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

Stumbling around on the internet

When did you first join the forum?

March 15th

What made you join?

To have someone I could talk to about this story and film that wasn't going to tell me to "move on, get over it"

Do you remember your first post?

Yes.

[Jannis]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

On the Internet. I read that there will be a movie about two cowboys in love, based on a short story by Annie Proulx. I didn't care about who the actors were going to be. That sure changed.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

Yes, many times.

When was the first time you saw it?

In February 2006. It was before the Finnish premiere. I was given a copy and illegal or not, there was no way I could not watch it.

How many times have you seen the movie?

I don't know. More than ten. Parts of it a lot more.

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

No. I saw it alone in the theater. At home I made my husband watch it with me the second time.

Which character did you most identify with?

Ennis 100 %. 

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

True love exists, but the world can be a shitty place for some of us.

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

Before - slightly boring after having moved to a small town where I didn't know anyone. After - I see many things differently, I've made wonderful friends here.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

I googled the movie. I wanted to read everything about it and the phenomenon.

When did you first join the forum?

June 30th after lurking for about two months.

What made you join?

This felt like a civilized place compared to other Internet forums. It felt silly to follow certain threads daily and just lurk. I wanted to join the fun.

Do you remember your first post?

Yes. Very nervous.

[ImEnnisShesJack]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain? Online.  Carol had been going on and on about BBM - I had heard about it for a while and it had been tagged that gay cowboy movie by media for so long that I just rolled my eyes.  I became intrigued when I heard Heath and Jake had been selected as the leads - an unusual combo for me at the time, but I'm okay with it now. I went to the official BBM movie site and heard the soundtrack and watched the trailer (about 40 times that first day).  I was such a wreck from that 2 minutes of film bits that I literally became obsessed in finding out everything I could about the project.  It was my tireless internet searching that led me to the original blog-forum that led me here.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?
Nope.  Bought the book after.

When was the first time you saw it?  Opening night in Indianapolis - turned out to be 12/16.  The demand was SO huge here in Indianapolis (a fairly conservative red state city) that our fine arts theatre ended up showing it on two screens with additional times added...


How many times have you seen the movie? 10 in the theatre.  probably a dozen or more times at home.  It's hard for me to watch.  Anyone who has read mine and/or Carol's stories knows how much impact this movie had for me.  It's painful to see (our) stupidity up on that screen...


Did you get any people to go with you? How many?
I took my two older kids on two separate occasions.  They both liked it.  FINALLY went with Carol to a screening one of the last days it was open here.


Which character did you most identify with? uh, Jack.



What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?
"Well I won't"  paintedshoes had that on her avatar for a long time.  And it's a message that I think we all need to hear - it has nothing to do with sexuality per se, but that no one should settle for less just because that is all that is expected of you.  YOU are the one who controlls your destiny.  I learned that I couldn't live the life someone else decided for me and took the grand step of offering that cow and calf operation to Carol.  It was a long uphill climb, but our story has a happier ending.  (now if we can just win the lottery and live the way we'd like to be accustomed...)


Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?  Oh complete 180.  I was alone and miserable and reaching out to my Ennis and she was in her marriage and trying to lie through another family holiday and miserable and couldn't make a decision and neither of us wanted to hurt anyone and yet we didn't want to stay miserable.  blah blah blah.  We're together now and it's been over 6 months.  Hard to believe after all the years of waiting and talking about our "someday" to finally have it here.



How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?
When did you first join the forum?
What made you join?
As I said above, I was obsessed with finding BBM info and stumbled into the old format via 'google'.  When I found this place I read for about 15 minutes and then joined.  I just saw all the thread topics and saw that I could finally pour out all this everything that I was feeling.  It was Jan 03, 06, like 11 o'clock at night or something...I was probably on the phone with Carol. lol.


Do you remember your first post? NO, but I went back and looked.  It was responding to the "What is your favorite scene?"  And here's what I said:

" The Dozy Embrace all the way.

The tenderness of their second night in the tent and the reunion kiss on the stairwell are close seconds.  I loved all 134 minutes of this movie.  I've seen it twice since it opened here in Indy, and am going to see it again this weekend.  I can't stay away.  This movie has opened my eyes (and mind) and broken my heart."

It still does.  One year later.














modified by CellarDweller to fix quote issue

[Bobbie]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?
I was miserable at work and had no desire to be at my job, so I spent my days searching the Net for another job.  I saw an advertisement for BBM on aol.com (which was a picture of Jack and Ennis.)  I thought Jake (didn’t recognize him or remember his name)  was the most beautiful man I’d ever seen…so I started reading about the movie.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No.  I knew nothing about the story until I learned about the movie.  Then I downloaded a condensed version of the story.

When was the first time you saw it?

One year ago Today!  December 19th 2005.  I played hookie from work and went to see it.

How many times have you seen the movie?

6 times.  I’m one of those folks who likes to savor the memories of just a few viewings.  BUT, it’s time to see it again.

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

I went alone.  I had a feeling it would be emotional and I didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of others.  I’m glad I went alone.  The first time was very precious and special for me.

Which character did you most identify with? Jack AND Alma

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

OMG…too much to get in to here.  Perhaps a requirement to see the world with greater love and acceptance…period.  Just choose to love regardless.  Pretty simple.

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?
I was miserable at work and physically sick due to it.  When I walked out of the movie the first time I saw it I remember feeling even more ill and wanting to scream at the top of my lungs “What the F**k is wrong with you people.”  I couldn’t believe anybody would suffer the torment Jack and Ennis suffered because of what society laid on them.  It was, and still is, out of my realm of belief.  I simply could not and cannot comprehend this.   I didn’t scream out in public…waited till I got to my car and then went hysterical.  Eventually I started asking myself questions about life, love, existing, and why?  I haven’t found the answers to these questions yet, and perhaps I won’t, but BBM gave me the impetus to start and keep asking them of myself…everyday!  Perhaps it’s in the journey to discover the answers to these questions that makes life worth living.     AND, I quit the old job eventually and got a new one I just adore!

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?
After I saw the movie for the first time, I desperately needed to talk to someone about it.  I’d googled BBM a dozen times and didn’t find anything I liked.  Then my Husband suggested I google “BBM Forum” and found Dave’s original blog just before the Forum went live.

I eventually became a Mod and then, after 8 months, decided I just wanted to be a regular member.  It’s been a very interesting experience and I’ve learned a lot.

When did you first join the forum?

December 2005.  I had trouble registering and it took 3 days to finally get in.

What made you join?

I liked how inviting and supportive everybody was.  It felt like a group of friends.

Do you remember your first post?   No, so I went in to the archives and found it.  It’s titled “Hallelujah!”  Here it is:

Thank Gawd and Yeeehaaaw!  I finally was able to register.  I've been trying for days.  Phew! 

Hi everyone.  I've been roaming the web checking out a number of sites about BBM and JG and finally found Dave Cullen's Blog.  I spent some time reading Dave's blog to get a sense of the posters and administrators, the tone of the board, and the level of analysis that goes in to the posts.  This site is really the best I've come across.  Everyone just seems so welcoming and on the same wave length about this powerful movie.

I'm not as eloquent or prolific a writer as many of the folks are here, but I'll try to form coherent sentences when I do post. 

Bobbie

[kumari]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

I read the short story in December of 2005 and spent an entire weekend completely absorbed by it.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

Yes, and I'm very glad that I did.

When was the first time you saw it?

December 18, 2005

How many times have you seen the movie?

Twice in the theater, countless times on DVD

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

Yes, I took 4 friends with me. The theater was so packed that we couldn't sit together.

Which character did you most identify with?

Jack. I have a deep need to connect with people.

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

The truth is always better, no matter how painful it is, than living a lie.

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

I strongly suspected that my husband was gay. After I saw Ennis onscreen, I was positive. I took him to see it on Christmas Eve of 2005, and that was the beginning of uncovering all of the secrets and lies that were hiding in his head. What a difference a year makes! Now we are best friends.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

I googled BBM and there it was!

When did you first join the forum?

I'm too lazy to look it up, but it was when the forum was still a part of Dave's blog and it was one long paragraph of posts.

What made you join?

I had looked for other outlets to talk about my marriage and what I was going through. I didn't find a home at any of the other support sites. This was the only place that felt like home to me.

Do you remember your first post?

I was probably arguing about whether it was ok to laugh when Alma sees Ennis and Jack from the door.

[babysany]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

I was never one to go to alot movies so this was not on my radar at all. My mom wanted to see it.  She doesn't drive out of town (where the movie was playing) so I took her.  By the time Jack was peeling that potato I was transported to Brokeback Mountain.



Had you read the story before you saw the movie?
No.



When was the first time you saw it?
Dec. 26, 2005


How many times have you seen the movie?
12 times in theater, lost count on DVD, 2 times on HBO.


 
Did you get any people to go with you? How many?
I got one friend to go.  She liked it but she didn't "get" it.  My mom liked it and saw it with me once more on DVD.  I prefered to go alone as it was my secret place.



Which character did you most identify with?
Jack.



What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?
We can't wait around for what we want to come to us.  You have to follow your heart.  One cannot live in denial.  True love does exist.

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?
I was settling for crumbs in various relationships.  I do not do that anymore now.  I've discovered my voice.  I have begun to take more of an activist role in gay rights.



How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?
I think it was from a link from someone's post on imdb.



When did you first join the forum?
February 2005



What made you join?
I was devastated last winter due to this movie.  No one in RL understood what I was going through. I identified with many of the people here and really enjoyed the thoughtful and thought provoking posts.



Do you remember your first post?
No.

 
 
 

[daphne]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

September 2005, Venice Film Festival. I read about BBM in the newspapers - the reviews were very good, so I became curious.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No.

When was the first time you saw it?

Jan. 21, 2006.

How many times have you seen the movie?

Theater: once. Home: I didn't count, but approximately between 10 and 15 times.

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

The first time I saw it with my husband. At home, I've always watched it alone.

Which character did you most identify with?

Ennis. So far no sign of Jack 

What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

I can't answer. I can't untangle them messages and lessons out of my emotions yet. For me BBM is still a "state of mind", a warm feeling, an attitude towards reality. I'll answer this question in next year's survey 

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

No big changes, but I'm happier, I have a deeper understanding of myself (thank you, Ennis ) and I'm more open to other people.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

Google, my saviour

When did you first join the forum?

May 2006.

What made you join?

Desperate loneliness. The impact had been too devastating, I needed to share. And people here seemed very nice and respectful, I'm not an expert but as far as I know kindness is not very easy to find on the internet forums.

Do you remember your first post?

I remember it was on the Fever Support Group, but I don't remember what I said.

[Rob in Puyallup]

Celebrating one year of Brokeback Mountain

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

Bumped into an advertisement or something while cruising the Net. Then watched the trailer.



Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No



When was the first time you saw it?

This time last year... Wednesday of that week. Almost exactly a year ago now!



How many times have you seen the movie?

25 times or so on the Big Screen, several times on DVD.



Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

Three in person, some more through recommendations.



Which character did you most identify with?

Ennis! That "identity" made me realize I needed to make some serious changes with my life... and I have!



What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

That life is too short to be concerned with what others think. That all approval, ultimately, comes to yourself by yourself, and most of all, that life is too short not to have someone to love and call "mine."



Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

I was in mourning... The death of my mother, the impending death of my father. Me, alone in this world, hiding deep in the closet, afraid of what people would do, would think of me, if I opened the door and exited. I thought until earlier this year that I had been suffering a long "midlife crisis", instead what was happening, was that I knew I was gay, afraid to admit it, afraid that all who were mine, would leave me...

I am now out of that closet, I've found love, have found many, many friends through this forum, and have found that most of my old friends, those before I came out, accepted me, were proud of me, or already knew that I was gay! With the exception of one "friend" all have accepted me "as is." I've noticed with this new honesty, that I am truly at ease in relationships that before were guarded. Life, in so many ways has improved because of our movie!



How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

After I saw the movie the first time I "Googled"  Brokeback Mountain. That search led me to a place where I could leave a message concerning how the movie affected me. I left a message there, in the original forum,  and within a couple hours I received an email alerting me to the new location. That was last January.



When did you first join the forum?

Early January, this year.



What made you join?

I had to know others who had been as affected as I was... had to get more information on the movie... the book... as much as I could... had to make serious changes in my life. Obviously, this was the place to go! Thanks, forum family members for supporting me, AND Nick and me this whole time!!!



Do you remember your first post?

Yes, and it's still here!


Thank you for this opportunity, Chuck!

 






modified by CellarDweller115 to fix quote issue

[Brokeback_1]

At this time last year, Brokeback Mountain made its appearance in the theaters of America.  Also, the Ultimate Brokeback Forum made its appearance on the internet.  To mark this occasion, we are presenting a list of questions for you.  We hope that reading and answering them will help you take a walk down memory lane, and remember the beginning of the journey we all took because of this movie that touched our minds and hearts.



How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?
I heard about the short story when it appeared--a close friend, a much older man then me, said "I want you to read something, it has characters you will relate to. One especially." I said 'What's it about??' he answered ' Two gay shepherds in Wyoming who fall in love." i said F**k You [lol] and didn't remember any of it until he reminded me this Fall.

I heard about the film first on tv. It set my alarm system off, I knew it meant something important but didn't have a clue what. Then i found one of those film preview articles in the NYDaily News...and knew it was necessary for me to see BBM. I really didn't have a clue what it was about, either, they didn't give away any plot items.  That was in july or August of 2005. Something inside me said you have to see this, it's important, you can NOT miss it. So I kept watch for it. And was determined to go but NOT alone.


Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No. I had not read anything by Annie Proulx.



When was the first time you saw it?

February 8, 2006

the 4:25 PM showing at my local theater in Brooklyn NY



How many times have you seen the movie?

16 in the theater. Some of those were double-dipping, i would see an early show and then stay for the 10:30 or a midnight, in Manhattan and Brooklyn. i saw it in both boroughs. I LOVED the late viewings.

Only a few times complete on DVD, maybe 4. I have watched various scenes so much the dvd is wearing out.



Did you get any people to go with you? How many?
 Yes.
I simply did not want to go alone, i was sick unto death of going places alone, so tired of it that I...just didn't go anywhere. And I just...knew..that I had to see this with someone  who wouldn't mock it. I know things sometimes. other times i'm blind.

I told my mother I had been given 2 tickets. She was delighted to go, eager to see BBM. We asked a close friend of hers, a woman I have known since I was born. So i saw it with 2 elderly women pushing 80 roflmaooo who were stunned by it.


Which character did you most identify with?

Jack Twist. Just like my elderly friend said I would when the story was published....


What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

Get the hell out of my own way and live the life god gave me, take the risk. Trust in the outcome, even if it's not what I thought it would be.... do the work and place  no preconceptions on the outcome. Be willing to accept what happens unconditionally. Be willing to have faith.

And if you love, stop waiting until one of you is dead, let them know.



Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

February 7, 2006
In New York:
 Feelin Nowhere and Nothing. Unhappy. Frustrated. Angry. Increasingly bitter. Self accusatory. Going nowhere faster, becoming deader, lonelier every day. Confused. On the verge of...something, I don't know what but it would not have been good.

December 20, 2006:
In Denver:
Madly in love & getting married in 2 weeks to a woman I've been in love with for 30 years [ we were 19, i'm serious...].
Her son whom I helped raise adores me and we are father/son in everything but biology.
I have a wonderful friendship with the only guy i ever loved, on a changed and good basis...after four f'ing years of no real word.
Younger, seriously younger in everything. Much younger roflmao.
Meeting fascinating people.
Actually having good friendships with people from the forum, the sort of thing where you KNOW each other intimately without having met so when you DO meet it's as if you HAVE met...make any sense?

If you want one word that word is ALIVE.

And i have fallen hook line and sinker in love with wyoming and run up there every chance I get.



How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

I did an internet search on Brokeback Mountain the night after I saw the film. Found the forum. It looked dopey. I went back the next night and looked around, read posts, was amazed at how many people felt what i felt. Joined the next night, still feeling silly.



When did you first join the forum?

February 11, 2006 around 3AM I think.



What made you join?

I felt I had to join, my inner warning system said: This Is Important.



Do you remember your first post?

Yes,I felt like an idiot but posted regardless. I felt...Phony. Fake. Silly. Why??? Because it was "not something I did". It was a step out of the ordinary, Something New...something I wasn't used to doing. And again, my inner warning system said it was VERY important.I posted about how clobbered and ripped to bits i felt after seeing Brokeback

It shocked me  that people ANSWERED my post. Jack, Heidi, Jim

[Joetheone]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

I read about it on gay.com and did not really know much about it.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?
No I had not read the story first


When was the first time you saw it?
January 2006 at the Millcreek Tinseltown in Erie Pennsylvannia


How many times have you seen the movie?

Movie theater 46 times at home I am too embarrassed to say

Did you get any people to go with you? How many?
Yes took people with most of the time but a lot of the time wanted to see just myself or with my partner


Which character did you most identify with?
Joe Agguire No I'm just kidding I find parts of myself in both Jack and Ennis


What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

This keeps changing in my mind almost daily.  But one thing for sure it makes me want to fight harder for my own personal acceptence in the world so maybe future generations will never have to know the pain and suffering so many of us have had to bear and still bear on a daily basis since we are not accepted even though the world is better then it was in 1963 or 1983 it still has a long way to go before a young homosexual person can have a true role model that is not a hairdresser or decorator or whatever and people accept it as being just normal whatever normal is. 

Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

You know it seems like my life was pretty ok until I sat in this movie then it was like my world turned upside down and to be honest it is spinning out of control still and I cannot focus somedays I feel like I have had a rebirth and I'm still trying to grab ahold of life and see where I should go from here on out.

How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

The first night I saw the movie after I stopped crying I started web searching until I found this amazing place with so many amazingily wonderful people.  This forum saved me from killing myself in dispair the first months

When did you first join the forum?

THe minute I found it the spirits who guide me told me this was a great place

What made you join?

I had to join to be apart of this life changing phenonema

Do you remember your first post?
No I really do not.  I should go back and read it but I think it was how this movie affected me which I commented on many times because each time I saw it or read more it made a lot of different things come out of my soul.

[danac]

Celebrating one year of Brokeback Mountain

At this time last year, Brokeback Mountain made its appearance in the theaters of America.  Also, the Ultimate Brokeback Forum made its appearance on the internet.  To mark this occasion, we are presenting a list of questions for you.  We hope that reading and answering them will help you take a walk down memory lane, and remember the beginning of the journey we all took because of this movie that touched our minds and hearts.



How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?


I kept hearing on certain news channels that the "cowboy" movie Ang Lee just released was pornographic. Finding that hard to believe, I went to see for myself.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No


When was the first time you saw it?

At the end of January


How many times have you seen the movie?


Thirteen times in the theatre and about twenty more on dvd.


Did you get any people to go with you? How many?


No. IT felt too private and personal and I didn't want outside comments or nattering during the film


Which character did you most identify with?


Ennis.



What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

Follow your bliss.


Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

My life hasn't changed...but my thoughts about love and regret have.



How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

Surfing the net looking for evermore info about the movie, the actors and the making of the film.



When did you first join the forum?

In February.


What made you join?

The almost desperate need to talk to people who had the same visceral reaction I did.


Do you remember your first post?

No. But, it was probably something like" Oh, thank God...I'm saved! "











modified by CellarDweller115 to correct quote issue.

[ruth]

How did you first find out about Brokeback Mountain?

A friend who keeps up on movie news told me about it.  I thought it sounded interesting but when I heard who the leads were I was skeptical, only being familiar with them from Day After Tomorrow and Heath's various teen movies. But when the reviews hit the Internet raving about it, and gasping "Holy crud! Heath Ledger can act?" I sought out the trailer and knew I had to see the film immediately. I was in love before I ever saw the film.

Had you read the story before you saw the movie?

No.

When was the first time you saw it?

Opening Night in Seattle.


How many times have you seen the movie?

4 in the theatre, 4 on DVD.


Did you get any people to go with you? How many?

I went with my movie friend first night; after that I took...let's see....4 others, who had varying degrees of liking it--some not at all, some pretty well---but it didn't stick with anyone of them like it did with me, to my frustration.


Which character did you most identify with?

Sometimes Jack, sometimes Ennis.  Probably mostly with Ennis.  Actually he reminded me so much of my grandfather and the people I grew up with, in his manner and speech.


What lesson/message did you get from the story/movie?

The importance of love but also its futility.


Where was your life when you first saw the movie? Where is it now?

Deeply depressed, lost in self pity.  I have grown beyond that I feel, to a certain extent. I do try to be more giving and to take life's setbacks a bit more in stride.


How did you first find the Dave Cullen Forum?

Google!


When did you first join the forum?

I was reading it in December but didn't join til later on.


What made you join?

I just had to have my say!


Do you remember your first post?

No, I don't unfortunately. I do remember being terribly nervous though.